Karma of being a pawn in someone’s drama
I was asked recently about a situation where someone I know, lets call her Kate, was out with her ageing mum. Mum unexpectedly met a friend while shopping who asked her why she hadn’t attended the recent annual Christmas party at the golf club. Mum said that she hadn’t been able to come because Kate needed her to baby sit. The friend gave Kate a nasty look, as if to say, “you don’t value your mother’s life, you just want her to serve you instead of coming to the annual party.” Only thing was, Kate knew nothing about it, Mum had not baby sat and Kate was in an embarrassing position. She later expressed her anger to her mother, who apologised and said she just hadn’t wanted to go but didn’t know what to say in the moment.
These are such human situations aren’t they? In a moment of fear, we commit ourselves to some story that is plausible but not true, to avoid facing a feeling, having a response to a situation that could bring criticism our way.
So, Mum had dodged it. Kate’s question was, did she carry the karma of her mother’s lie?
Each situation is different. In this situation I invited Kate to have compassion for her mum, who clearly had an upsurging of fear, a kind of paralysis of thought and was out of touch with her self empowerment.
At the same time it was perfectly proper for Kate to put a boundary in place, trying to do it gently, this is the part around her own empowerment. Having the conversation that needs to be had, and doing inner work around how we feel. As Kate had no intention to deceive, there can not be karma attaching to her, it attaches to her mother.
Kate’s challenge is to forgive her, have the necessary discussion, and let it go, allowing herself not to go into separateness and judgment, but to get even closer in love and compassion to her mum.
Love, Shakti Durga
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